When ever I hear the song of a bird.

So I have a new calling in my new ward. I am the Primary chorister. I can not read notes and know nothing about teaching music. It's kinda funny cause people think that because you can sing then you must know music. While I am sure that is true for most people for me that is not the case at all! I was reluctant to accept the calling but I have never turned down a calling nor will I ever so here I am. And I must say that I love it. I think I feel the spirit every singing time. Primary songs are written with such simple to understand truths and every time I hear the kids sing them I am reminded of how great this gospel really is. One of my favorites is "My Heavenly Father loves me". "When ever I hear the song of a bird, or look at the blue blue sky. When ever I feel the rain on my face or the wind as is rushes by. When ever I touch a Velvet rose, or walk by a lilac tree, I'm glad that i live in this beautiful world Heavenly Father created for me. He gave me my eyes that I might see the color of butterfly wings he gave my ears that I might hear the wonderful sounds of things. He gave me my life my mind my heart, I thank him reverently for all His creations of which I'm apart , yes I know Heavenly Father loves me." This song is such a simple reminder of our Heavenly Fathers love for all of us and I love how it teaches us to see his love in such simple yet amazing things that are a part of our ever day lives. We sang this song today as our reverence song to start of singing time and I couldn't help but feel how much my heavenly father loves me. As singing time went on we came to a song that I have been trying to teach the kids, but it has proven to be very difficult for me the notes are kinda hard and I mess up all the time embarrassing my self in front of all these little people who rely on me to know what I am talking about....well I am trying to know but I am not there yet. The song is " The Lord gave me a temple". The second verse sings " on resurrection morning I'll take my body bright" I was trying to teach the kids about resurrection and what it means so to help them understand what they are singing in hopes it would help them remember the words.... Now I don't know if it is because her birthday is next month or what but as I was teaching them about the resurrection I could not help but remember my sister Annellie, I have been thinking about her allot this month with Annabelle's blessing and all. I always notice her absence so much more with big family events. While teaching this to the kids I pictured that great day when we all will be resurrected and be able to embrace each other again I became choked up with excitement mixed in with the pane of missing her so much. The spirit bore whiteness to me today through that song that this will happen someday and gave me more drive to live my life better so to be worthy of such a blessing.
I am grateful for my calling even though it is a challenge my testimony of gospel truths is strengthened each Sunday because of it and for that i am thankful.

just breath

I set a goal to exercise everyday other than Sundays a little over three weeks ago. I am happy to report that I have achieved my goal thus far. I don't do the same thing every day but something different everyday. I have noticed a big difference in my stress level. Not to say that I don't get stressed at all anymore....I wish I could say that for the sake of my two sweet children. But I am able to handle it much better than I do when I don't exercise. I just think it is good to sweat a little and most of all breath deep. That is one reason why I love to run or do yoga at least a couple of times a week. Just giving my self time in the morning while everyone is still dozing to be alone and to breath deep helps me get my thoughts together and set the tone for my day. Now I just need to remember to pray before I start my day. Speaking of which I had better get on that.

Getting into shape is hard!

So I am trying to get back into shape. I am not trying to lose weight I am trying to build muscle so everyday after I get the kids down for a nap I put on my work out clothes and start doing yoga or this other work out DVD that I have. I have to say I feel a lot better through out my day but it is so hard! My goal is to to be able to do the hand stand part on my yoga DVD so I will let you know when I am able to do it and I will even post pics. So you should hear back from me in about a six months to one year. :) I might even post pics of my attempts just for a good laugh!

swimsuit time :-|

So the other day I went to the swimming pool with my kids and found that after almost one year of not being pregnant I am still only comfortable in my maternity swim suit! On our way to the pool I fondly remembered how "fat" I was in High School and thought to myself how I would love to be that fat again. I have been hoping and not doing much working on getting my body worthy to be in a swimsuit with out having to have shorts and a t-shirt on. I was tempted to just go in pants my legs are so pasty white. So I am doing something about it this year. I am going to get into shape,get a tan. But not only that I am getting a new swimsuit that will compliment my motherly figure. Take a look!

Ahhh freedom

So on Thursday evening I had to run to the store. It had been a long day and the last thing I wanted to do was go grocery shopping, but you gotta do what you gotta do right. So on my way out I grabbed my rascal flats CD and thought well I can listen to this and try to make the best of things. Any way before I knew it I was on my way music blasting singing to the top of my lungs and then out of the blue I got all chocked up and started to cry. I felt so silly. Why would I be crying and then I noticed how free I felt, I had not one single child with me I was all alone. How nice. I was able to just breathe for a minute. I didn't have to tell Nehemiah to stop torturing his sister and I didn't have to deal with Baea screaming while I got her ready for bed turning what should be a few minute ordeal into something that lasts way longer than it should I didn't have to cook dinner cause as soon as I got back for the store I got to go to enrichment night for the relief society. So just for a few hours I was FREE from cares and it was just kind of overwhelming I think....so that is why I was crying. By the end of the night after talking and laughing with some other moms who felt the same way I do I felt ready and happy to go home and be a mom again. So the point of me sharing this is just to say that it's good to take brakes when ever you get the chance (even if you are just running errands) blast your music get away from your cares for just a minute so you can come back ready to start again feeling much better.

I'm a lucky girl!

Bob and I have been married for five years and have never had to purchase a dining table. We ate on the kitchen floor for the first five or six months and then my sister in-law Kristie found a table and chairs at a yard sale for a few bucks and bought it for herself and then ended up giving it to us. We still use it for our kitchen table. When we bought this house we had an empty space where the official dining room should be and then Cat gave me a table that was given to her which she no longer has use of. It was small but worked for the time being but did look a little odd seeing as it had no chairs for it. Anyway a couple of weeks ago I was up north visiting family and my husband told me to go to my most favorite store in the world in snowflake, The White Chair, to pick out my Mother’s Day present. So without argument I simply obliged. While there I found the perfect table to fill that spot but it was way out of my price range and didn't even include the chairs so I lost the excitement of it all pretty quick. When I got home I told Bob about it in passing. I just mentioned that I found this great table that was just perfect but way too expensive. And then that was it. I went on not thinking much about it after that. WELL I guess Bob didn't he called the owner of the store talked her way down on her price and got me all the chairs to go with it, then surprised me with on Saturday. Hence the title "I'm a lucky girl".

My little garden, and tiny little feet.

Well today was a frustrating day for me. My son as of late has become very difficult to deal with. I do not know what is going on growing pains I guess. But to top it all off today I had my niece and nephew over to play and was enjoying the break for a little bit when my niece came in and told me that Nehemiah and Jacob were walking in the flowers, "I think they think it is grass" she said. So I go out to find most of my flowers trampled to the ground. Why do I even try. I clean my house just so I can clean it again five minutes later I try and make my yard nice just so all my hard work can be trampled under foot by two little monsters, as cute as they may be. Tonight I am feeling very much a failure as a mother and a home maker. And being very tired does not help me much in my self loathing. I love my kids to bits but I have to say some days I wouldn't mind if they were able to go to grandmas for the day:). But tomorrow is another day and I have every intention of getting up and trying again....I just wish I didn't have to.